How to Tell Your Bandmate Is About to Quit

Being in a band is a lot like being in a family. You laugh together, argue together, and occasionally wonder if hiding someone's instrument would improve everyone's quality of life. While every band goes through rough patches, there are usually a few warning signs that someone may be thinking about calling it quits.

Here are a few of the classic ones.

They stop arguing.

Believe it or not, this is usually the biggest warning sign. When someone still argues, it means they still care. Once they stop caring enough to even complain, they may already have one foot out the door.

They suddenly miss every rehearsal.

At first it's a doctor's appointment. Then it's a family emergency. Then they have to wash the dog. Eventually you begin to suspect the dog has cleaner teeth than anyone you've ever met.

They stop talking about future plans.

The band starts discussing the next album or upcoming shows, and they just shrug. They don't seem excited anymore because, in their mind, they may not even be around for the next project.

Their gear starts disappearing.

One week the extra amplifier is gone. The next week they "loaned" their microphone to someone. Before long they're showing up with an acoustic guitar they borrowed from their uncle because they already sold everything else.

They become suspiciously nice.

The person who used to argue over every little detail suddenly agrees with everything.

"Sure, whatever songs you want."

"I don't care where we rehearse."

"Sounds good to me."

It's almost unsettling.

They start saying things like...

"You guys will be fine without me."

Or...

"I've always wanted to learn accounting."

Neither statement inspires confidence.

Of course, sometimes someone isn't planning to quit at all. Maybe they're just burned out, overwhelmed with work, or dealing with personal issues. Before assuming the worst, check in with them. A simple conversation can often solve problems long before they become permanent.

And if all else fails...

Hide the van keys.

Bob Craypoe
Founder of Craypoe Productions and Creator of the Punksters characters